On my way to Harlingen yesterday, I stopped at one of their newest flagship stores in Wharton, TX. Their beef jerky makes for a great snack when you have about four hours left to drive, and I wanted to take advantage of their bathrooms (without having to worry if I’d have to wipe pee off the toilet seat). In the bathroom, I noticed that they had hung “art” on the wall behind the toilet. By art, I mean that there was a framed 36″ by 24″ piece of gunny sack hanging with a price tag of $9.99. I laughed to myself, wondering who would ever buy that; not only was it hideous, but when people asked, would you tell them that you found it in the bathroom at Buc-ee’s hanging above the toilet?

When I travel, the most interesting thing to me is all the different people I come across. When I had walked into Buc-ee’s, I could easily tell that people here were definitely not from the “big city.” Everyone moved a little slower (including the mom and her son who I was stuck walking behind with no way to get around) and it was apparent that Buc-ee’s was one of the biggest things to come to their city in a long time. So, I guess I shouldn’t have been shocked that when I came out of the bathroom, I walked by a couple in their 50’s and overheard the wife, who was holding up the gunny sack toilet art, telling her husband how amazing it would look in their front hallway. I can only imagine how the rest of their residence was decorated.

And with that, I bought my peppered beef jerky and continued on my way.

I have to say, I believe my version of WINNING is quite possibly better than his; I have yet to upload rambling videos here that reference a rocket ship to the moon where all the warlocks and trolls shall be vindicated, and we will view the bi-polar Earth from afar. I mostly made that up.

No, in my version of WINNING, I took to the radio airwaves in a heated battle over song identification. This morning, when I turned on my car to head to work, I caught Special K from the local 104.1 KRBE radio station playing on a Casio synthesizer in “elevator music style.” He said “if you recognize this song call in!” Now, I definitely recognized the song. Usher’s “OMG” haunted me last summer when I would go on drives around my neighborhood in Houston. At one point, I remember alternating between three stations, and it seemed as if I was stuck in a perpetual groundhog’s day where Usher wanted to “love me down” and I just wanted to file a restraining order. So in the next moment, I was dialing 713-390-KRBE. I am still not sure why.

As I backed out of my parking spot, I got exactly what I expected: a busy signal. I told myself I’d give it one more try and then continue on my drive to work, so I hit redial and waited. And then, instead of a busy tone, it started ringing. At this point, I wasn’t exactly sure what to do. The last time I called into a radio station was in 1997, when I was 13, and then it was to request Leeann Rimes’ song, “How Do I Live.” The busy signal had never deterred me; I hit redial a record amount of times, and when three hours later I FINALLY got to request the song, I stayed glued to the radio another four hours waiting for the damn thing to play. Thus, I learned two things: the system was rigged, and I had horrible taste in music.

I believe the phone rang a least ten to fifteen times, or as I would call it, eternity. When I got to the point when I was contemplating hanging up, Special K suddenly answered the phone and said “104.1 KRBE what is your call for?” And my brain decided to show off my intelligent side.

“Uh…well, I um, knew the song?”

“GREAT! So you want to participate in the contest?”

“Sure?” (Contest….??!)

“Ok, when you get on air, remember to be EXTRA excited and happy!! What’s your name and where are you calling from?!”

“Kelly from …downtown?”

“Where downtown?”

“Downtown downtown…uh GREENWAY PLAZA!”

“Awesome! Just hangout on the line and we’ll get to you in a minute.”

And then I almost shit my pants. I was going to be on the radio. Participating in a contest that I didn’t realize I was calling to participate in. One Republic’s “Apologize” was currently playing, followed shortly by Rihanna’s “Only Girl in the World.” At this point I seriously considered the ramifications of hanging up, but by the time I was pulling onto Highway 59, I was on one of Houston’s most popular radio stations. Thank God it was spring break and I was in the lightest traffic I’d seen since Christmas.

This is the point where I found out what was happening. Fortunately, I had listened to other people participate in this contest before. Another contestant and I were competing to win a $104 gas card. We had to identify three songs based on Special K’s version of them. The other contestant went first, which is good because I was already mortified that my speaking voice on the radio had been about 10 times as high as what it is normally. She correctly guessed her first song and then it was my turn. I braced myself for public humiliation but suddenly realized I knew the song: La Roux’s “Bulletproof.” One down, two to go.

The next song played for her was Cee Lo Green’s “F You.” Sadly for her, she thought the song was by “Cee Cee Something” so she ended up not getting getting credit. When I identified Katy Perry’s “Firework” within 3 seconds, I took the lead 2-1. Then, she correctly identified Enrique Iglesies’ “I Like It,” so it was my turn for the win, which I secured with Pink’s “Please Don’t Leave Me.” I’m slightly ashamed that I knew all of these songs, but either way, I now get to go pick up $104 dollars from the KRBE studio because of it!

And most importantly, while I may not be as WINNING as Charlie Sheen (depending on your definition of WINNING), at least I know that my bachelors and master’s degrees in music were not in vain. After years of having to identify classical music played for me during exams, I should have known that a few pop songs would not break me.

My grandmother’s niece sent her a beautiful arrangement for the holidays, so I had to snap a few shots. This is probably my favorite of the set, and it reminds me of why I have always loved Christmas. Which also probably explains why my decorations are still out. I promise I’ll pack them away. Soon…

ANYWAY. Just thought I would give a quick holiday update. I suppose I should use the term “holiday” loosely, as we’re now four days into the new year and the next holiday is two weeks away (thanks MLK)! Unless, of course, you count my birthday on Saturday. Lets do that.

This was my first Christmas in my new apartment and really, it was my first Christmas on my own. When I was in college I would always come home about two weeks after Thanksgiving, so there was really no need to put up a tree or any other decorations. I definitely made up for that this year. My tree went up the day after Thanksgiving and is shamefully still standing in true Kelly From Texas style:

At this point, I might as well just call it a birthday tree. At any rate, I hope you and yours had a lovely holiday season this year. 2010 is not only a new year, but a new decade. What will it bring?

The previous statement probably made no sense as I’ve offered no explanation of my job or what I do at all. It’s easy to say “oh, I’m an admissions counselor for the University of Houston,” but that could not possibly describe what I do completely. Remember when you were in high school and you had a “college fair night?” The people at those booths? That’s me. But the thing you don’t realize is that the person behind that booth did not magically appear; they had to travel there with a car load full of all the materials that are on their table and if it was raining they hauled it all in while getting drenched. It can be miserable. But I wouldn’t trade it for anything.

I promise to tell you more later; in my three months on the job, I have met some of the most ridiculously stupid people you could ever imagine. But for now, I need to get to sleep. I’ll change lives tomorrow.

Or crush dreams.

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